Rachel, Todays Mama, talks about how water flows around curves and takes the path of least resistance and always finds its right path. She compares the impact of the internet to the industrial revolution- I love it, so apt.
Mommy Niri talks about challenges growing up and how she always knoew education as her ticket out of poverty in South Africa. After being evacuated and losing everything during riots, she realized that everything is fungible. Things don’t matter, a house is just a house. And blogging gives you a voice.
Stephanie Quiloa, @skinnyjeans, talks about her heritage as a storyteller from her Grandmotherm Rose. Discusses authenticity- “Write from your heart, things you can’t shut up about. That’s where impact happens, that’s where value lives.”
Stephanie is a recovering perfect girl. Trying to be perfect actually help her back, she realized. In BISJ, she shared tips, but also the “Messy middle”. The part between the before and after picture. Reads autobiographies because she likes to know what happens when people fall down and hw they get back up. Things that have guilt and shame attached to them, because she wanted to give her past and pain a voice. Healing from those things is =very hard and lonely. She wanted people to feel less alone and stigmatized. Writing about those things helped her let go of “PERFECT GIRL.”
She went through a bulimia relapse- she and her boyfriend broke up, she and her business partner broke up, and she had to ask her parents for money. She turned 40, and her inner 19 year old was unrelenting. She was going to quit her blog, but decided to come out and tell the truth before she did it.
She hit publish, and saw the most amazing outpouring of love. One of the biggest reasons why she loves Social media. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable, people show up for you. And to her surprise, her traffic skyrocketed, publishers called, and sponsors began making inquiries. Sharing dark, twisty stuff can actually be more empowering than trying to be a strong “Perfect Girl.”
Biggest traffic drivers to her blog: Bacon, Farts, and Muffin Top. Her search rankings were going up. Whatever your niche is, people re probably searching the slang. Bacon, farts and muffin tops- guaranteed traffic. In Google, if you take the time to name your images, it really helps with search.
Biggest thing she’s learned from a business standpoint: Fight For the Value of Your Content. If you’re driving traffic, your content has value. When you are paid the value of your work, you are generating value to the world.
Emphasize: Fight For the Value of your content. Whatever they try to give you, negotiate.
Other lesson: Keeping an open heart. Her friend Jen moved to Colorado. All this open space, and went back to Cali and didn’t understand why. California was the graveyard of her past. For her t move on from her past, she needed to physically move. She chose Phoenix, AZ. Had Twitter, Facebook, and Google maps. It was a great decision, she’s made more friends in the last 8 months than the last five years.
Like Rachel said, she’s now flowing with the river instead of salmon swimming upstream.
You never know where the river will take you: 5 years ago, she never knew talking about her skinny jeans would ean her a living.
Wendy Sachs from Care.com will walk away with bacon and farts incorporated into her life.
Her father, Paul Levine, has over 4,000 facebook friends- 1,000 of which are also fellow writers. She writes on the HuffPo, writes thought provoking pieces.
Wrote a book called “How She Really Does It”. Came out 7 years ago, and her publisher advised her to have a website and a blog. Went to work at a PR agency. She went to work full time at a PR agency, and got a call from MommyTrackd to write for them.
What is so amazing about social media is that the work life stuff, and talking about the mundane. It gives us a place to talk about the things that matter that may not look like they matter to a patriarchal society. Poopy diapers, breastfeeding, other women make you feel empowered to know that you’re not alone. CafeMom’s new Mom index shows that 85% of moms are really happy with their marriages. That number was shockingly high. What was really amazing was that women are spending 19 hours a week online networking socially, as opposed to 3 hours a week speaking to their real life friends.
Heather Spohr, the Spohrs are Multiplying
Leads with a picture of Heather at a bar, went out for her 23 birthday. Wrote her first blog post exactly 8 years ago today. Wrote it on Diaryland.
“I’m so hungover. I’m so glad that I work for a record label because everyone else is stoned. I really hope my bosses congerence call runs long so I can take a nap.”
What she would give to be that idiot kid, going out and drinking on a worknight.
Flash fwd four years- she married Mike, worked for the Dodgers. Went to Fiji for a honeymoon, discussed starting a family right away. Five months later she was pregnant.
But. If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. Early in her pregnancy, she had a number of blood clots, and she was told that “She may want to consider terminating, because you may not like what comes out.”
But if she was going to survive and make it through this crazy pregnancy, she was going to have to change. Tests, specialists, and second and third opinions were now the norm. At 19 weeks, her water broke. Serious bedrest ensued.
The sex in the city style blog changed into something very different.
Madeleine Alice Spohr (AKA Maddie) was born 12 weeks before her due date, and Heather had to learn how to be a mother in what felt like a very unnatural situation. After 68 days in the NICU, Maddie came home.
Despite the breathing treatments Maddie needed at home, getting to be her mommy at home was a joy. It grew from being a bulleting board for her family to being a venue to share her experiences as the mom of a very premature baby. She found Twitter and all of the social media things we know and love. Most of her friends didn’t understand what it was like to have a child, let alone a sick child.
Though Maddie had her issues, she was the happiest little girl in the world. But when she was 4 days shy of turning 17 months old, her lungs took a turn for the worst and she passed away suddenly.
Heather and Mike’s social media network went to work, and Maddie’s life changed the world in unexpected ways. An offhand comment Heather made to a friend about no flowers, please donate to the March of Dimes. Then everything took on a life of its own as people wanted to help and share the life of the beautiful big eyed baby girl with the unforgettable grin.
Heather and Mike started a charity to help the families of babies in the NICU. Heather continued to blog through her grief, and though it felt messy and imperfect, it felt crucial. Though it wasn’t a role she had planned on, her blog became a place for people to connect.
As much as telling Maddie’s story gave her purpose, getting pregnant with Annabelle gave her strength. Maddie saved Annabelle’s life. Because of the chart from Heather’s pregnancy with Maddie, her doctors caught a life-threatening clotting disorder that was managed during Annabelle’s pregnancy, She was born 3 weeks before her due date, but was healthy.
The keynote closes with Dave Matthew’s “Where Are You Going” as pictures of the four inspiring women flash in a slideshow. If there’s a dry eye in the house, it’s not at my table. This is kicking off to be a powerful few days.
-Lindsay Maines, @rockandrollmama
